Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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