I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize