Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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