She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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