that's an acceptable place to lick
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
