never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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