smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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