I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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