I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
