I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
