what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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