get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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