can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
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