You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
