things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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