do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Randomize
