I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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