i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
