I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
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