I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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