The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
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