I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
When did we convert life to cartoon?
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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