fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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