how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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