his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
