I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Randomize