Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize