Buhtt sex?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
