i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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