I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
