So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
