maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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