I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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