loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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