Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
