Soap is not a condiment
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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