Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I could make wine with my vomit
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Randomize
