Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Randomize
