toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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