I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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