and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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