Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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