Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize