Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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