i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
