I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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