so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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