no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
