Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
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he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
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