this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
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