dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.