and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
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