I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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